RrrrrrrrrrrrrING The Rupununi calling

At last it would appear that the Rupununi will ring in a new year with the sound of cell phones echoing across the savannah. Picture if you will every termite mound equipped with a miniature antenna to forward your call to the next mound. It is reported that sales of the newest style phones (those which looks very much like small armadillos) are booming. Phones in the shape of mango’s, coconuts, iguanas, and fish have proven to be a little slow to catch on.

Several leather craftsmen report advance orders for phone carriers, ones which will hang on bicycle/motorbike handle bars, spring models which will absorb the ride in land rovers, and of course the ever popular holster model for quick draw from the hip.

This writer sees no end of problems brought about by this new technology. Bicycle collisions due to gaffing while riding, termite mounds being crashed into and antennas knocked down, disrupting service. Family disputes will be taken to a new level, as one spouse is regaled over their cell-phone while in the middle of a lime with the boys. Sibling rivalry will be taken to new heights as possession of the only cell phone in the house is up for grabs. Parents will be awakened all hours of the night with the ringing of phones, is ---- there, can I talk to she/he. School children will no longer do math in the same old boring way, now it will be the stored numbers on your phone, times how many times you can redial before it cuts out, equals the frustration level you can cause the teacher. Shop owners will no longer be assured of a peaceful nights sleep (rrrring, are you open to sell, no! well what time will you open, and do you have cell phone batteries?)

One can only hope that this new fangled gadget will not catch on in the bush. This could prove to be an even bigger problem than will be encountered in town.

Baboons (red howler monkeys) will no longer sing in early mornings, they will be too occupied in spreading the news, via their new cell phone, about what the macaws, and toucans were up to last night.

Tigers(jaguars) will go hungry, because phone calls will be made in advance alerting would be meals as to the route of travel. Unless of course the Tigers, and Harpy’s can get together with the anteaters, destroy a few big termite mounds and disrupt service.

The peace and quiet of the Rupununi will be no more.

But alas as with most new technology, sometimes all is not as it easy as it seems. As our two American technicians here to help the local phone company will attest, The Rupununi will collect her dues. Dues, in sweat, bug bites, dietary distress, and “just Now-i-tus” “Here now, those parts were ordered far in advance of your arrival and were guaranteed to be delivered on time. The fact that we received no less than a truck load of parts that were not the right ones is irrelevant. We got them didn’t we?” “ Red tape, what red tape? Must be the red dust has caused all that paper work to look red.” “What, you want to go home for Christmas?” You really want to go back to all that snow, ice scraping, wind chill below -30, 24hour electric, super markets, big mac’s, shopping malls, etc. etc. Well we may just let you take a week or so off, but rest assured we will have you back. After all who is going to install all those little antennas on the ant hills?

An the Rupununi Continues to Spin Happy Holidays

12/04 shefishs